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Formal vs Informal Italian

Move fluently between tu and Lei, and know when each one actually matters.

By C1, you already know tu (informal) and Lei (formal) exist. What matters now is judgment: native speakers constantly calibrate register based on age, hierarchy, and setting — and getting it slightly wrong reads as either cold or presumptuous.

The unwritten rules

  • Younger colleagues often use tu with each other immediately, even at work.
  • Lei never fully disappears with doctors, professors, or anyone significantly older — even in casual industries.
  • It's polite to let the older or higher-status person propose switching to tu — dare del tu.

Possiamo darci del tu?

Shall we switch to informal 'tu'?

A genuinely useful phrase — asking permission to drop formality is itself a very Italian social move.

Vocabulary in this lesson

  • dare del tu

    to address someone informally

    Ci diamo del tu?

  • dare del Lei

    to address someone formally

    In ufficio do del Lei al capo.

  • confidenza

    familiarity/closeness

    Non abbiamo abbastanza confidenza.

Check yourself

Instant feedback as you answer each question.

Who typically proposes switching from Lei to tu?
"Possiamo darci del tu?" means…

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